Embrace your natural plus-size curves and be unapologetic about it
Every day, as I tap through my phone or move my cursor to international media sites, body-positive articles are slowly popping up. Let it be a feature article, a campaign or an Instagram account, the Western media is actually embracing more than one body type that is not slim. Representation and diversity are gradually becoming the thing. And it’s a great time to witness the distorted beauty standards we’re so used to progressively changing to accepting more diverse and different types of beauties.
Unfortunately, when it comes to the local media we’re still a bit slow. So, as a plus-size woman myself, I’d like to share my knowledge on how to be a kick-ass, plus-size girl and be darn good at it!
Believe It When They Say You’re Gorgeous
When people, whether a man or woman, say you’re gorgeous or beautiful, pretty, cute and genuinely compliment you, believe them. I used to brush it off and think they’re only saying it to be nice, but that’s my loss. Fun fact: when people genuinely compliment you, it’s because they really see it and they see all of you. Try not to dismiss their perspective of you. We’re too focused on our flaws that we can’t see the plus points in ourselves sometimes.
We All Have Tummy Rolls
When I mean we, I mean EVERYONE! From model-esque girls to athletic girls with six-pack abs, when we sit or bend down our tummy will develop rolls. So, chill out. Quit thinking it’s the worst thing to ever exist on your body and try accepting (and embracing!) those cute pouches (I like to call it a pouch because it reminds me of a kangaroo) you have. You can’t be hiding behind your tummy rolls forever.
Stop Thinking Every Part of You is Big
“My arms are big”, “my thighs are huge”, “my butt is too prominent” and all those insecurities: I think we’ve heard it all from our girlfriends and even from ourselves. But you know what? No one actually cares if your arms are big or your thighs jiggle. They really don’t. Trust me; the first thing people look at a person is their face and presentation. Not their arms, thighs or butt, and this applies to the rest of the people looking at you.
You’re Stunning Because of Who You Are
Beauty does lie under ‘skin deep’, but you’re not stunning despite your body. You’re stunning because of it. There’s a difference. We grow up in a society where anything more than size UK12 is deemed ‘unattractive’ and ‘fat’, but we’re so much more than our bodies and it’s a part of us whether we like it or not. Our bodies have been through so much and deserve all the love and pampering as much as our mental health.
You Will Get Someone If You Allow It
An announcement to all single plus-size ladies: there is someone out there who finds you attractive and wants to be with you despite your size. Sounds bizarre, eh? Maybe you don’t know it yet but there is always someone for everyone. There are people who love bigger-sized partners or sometimes they don’t really care but are just attracted to your personality. Attraction is a funny thing; you just can’t explain it at times. Also, you don’t have to lose weight because you want someone; someone will come to you if you allow it.
Embrace the Word ‘Fat’
You heard that right. Fat is just another word, like how skinny is just a word to describe size. If people can compliment cats, puppies and babies for being fat in a positive way, I don’t see why we can’t embrace the word? You’re fat and what? Besides, if people were to make fun of you and call you fat, the word doesn’t affect you much anymore anyway. Trust me on this one.
Fat Girls do Bang Hot Guys
You didn’t think that would happen, would you? How many movies have told us since young that if you’re fat, you never land the hot guy; plenty, ya? I hate to break your bubble but we actually do land him. All the time. And when I say hot, I mean foine men with six packs and six-feet tall. Next time, if you see a cute guy you like across the room, don’t be afraid to approach him for a chat and flirt with him a little. Take a risk. And if all else fails, hey, there are other hot fishes in the sea!
Buy That Crop Top You Like & Wear It
Yes. Buy it and wear it, I’m not joking. Who says cropped tops or any other clothing for that matter are only limited to a certain body size? Sure, the media has been telling us to not wear a certain type of clothing that doesn’t flatter our body but that shouldn’t stop us, right? Wear that bikini, those cute shorts from Cotton On or that mini skirt from H&M. The world is your oyster, and that also applies to your choice of clothing!
If you’re too shy to reveal your shape and skin just yet, slowly work your way in. Instead of your casual T-shirt and jeans, maybe pair a cropped top with high-waist jeans. Dip your toes in the trend by showing your skin bit by bit and you’ll gradually have enough confidence to show it tastefully; sexy not trashy!
Be Unapologetically Yourself
Don’t be sorry that you exist. Make it well known to society that you’ve arrived and you’re here to stay! Why do you think you see those confident plus-size girls conquer the room once they enter the premises? Because they own their light! Build up your confidence and your energy. If you’re not confident of yourself just yet, work at your best qualities. If you’re funny, show them your sense of humour. Nice smile? Smile loads! Be the sunshine of the party.
I’m going to be really honest with you here; loving yourself is the scariest journey you’ll ever go through, but when you finally do, the outcome is amazing. No one can replace your own happiness and own love for yourself. This doesn’t make you vain, but it will liberate you in every sense of your being. The best thing about it? You don’t give a hoot about what people say about you!
And It’s Okay to Not Love Yourself At Times
We’re not robots. We’re humans with self-esteem and insecurities, especially after being indoctrinated and brainwashed since young about our bodies. I get it: loving yourself takes a long time and it doesn’t happen overnight. Allow yourself to be weak for a bit. Be sad, cry, sob, do whatever you want to release steam, then get up, throw your middle finger up in the air and move forward. Because you’re an independent, sexy, fierce and smart woman who deserves to have fun and love your body!
Lastly, You Are Beautiful
You are, you truly are! If this doesn’t convince you that you’re beautiful in any size, probably this body positive campaign from All Woman Project‘s #IAmAllWoman might cheer you up.
Remember, you are beautiful!